Sledging should not be banned - Part 1

13 Jan

Posted by Nanda under Fun Stuff

Some interesting tidbits on sledging in cricket:

In a Sheffield Shield game between NSW and SA, a Waugh twin was taking an enternity to take guard, asking the umpire for centre, middle and leg, two legs - the whole lot. Then he steps away towards leg side and has another look around the field, before re checking centre. Jamie Siddons, a prolific run scorer who unluckily never played a test is at slip, and decided enough is enough. “For christ sake, it’s not a ‘f*cken test match.” Waugh replies: “Of course it isn’t … You’re here.”
In the 1980’s Ian Botham returned early from a tour of Pakistan, and on radio joked “Pakistan is the sort of country to send your mother in-law to.” Needless to say the Pakistanis did not find this amusing, and when Pakistan defeated England in the 1992 World Cup Final, Aamer Sohail told Ian Botham “Why don’t you send your mother-in-law out to play, she cannot do much worse.”
In one of the tour matches in South Africa, Australia played Hansie Cronje’s province. Cronje was at the non strikers end, there was a short chubby batsman on strike. Ian Healy yelled to Warne, “Bowl a Mars Bar half way down…We’ll get him stumped” The Aussies and Cronje were all in hysterics, all this was before a classic reply from the batsman. “Nah, Boonie (David Boon) fielding at short leg will be onto it before I can move.”
Tino Best, never short of a word or two when he is bowling, was done up like a kipper by the England all-rounder as West Indies slumped to defeat in the first Test. Flintoff saw his opponent preparing to face Giles’ off-spin and shouted: “Watch the windows, Tino!” The wind-up had the desired effect, causing Best to come charging out of his crease like a man possessed. He took a wild swing at the ball, missed and was promptly stumped by Geraint Jones. Flintoff spent the next five minutes laughing, as Best sat on the balcony rueing his stupidity.

Gavaskar had decided to relinquish his opening position and come in at no 4 for that test. But, Malcolm Marshall fired out Anshuman Gaekwad and Dilip Vengsarkar for ducks, setting the stage for Gavaskar to walk in at 0/2.And he thought there would be less pressure! Viv Richards says, “Man, it don’t matter when you come in to bat, the score is still zero.”
Watson started giving Pietersen some lip (strangely after Pietersen had put him 10 rows back!) to which Pietersen apparently retaliated with ”You’re just upset ‘cos no-one loves you anymore!” Watson proceeded to lose the plot. Ponting and Martyn afterwards in the background were having a chuckle with Pietersen, acknowledging the good sledge as Watson sauntered off to fine leg.
South Africa were touring New Zealand. Darryl Cullinan comes in to bat. A young Daniel Vettori bowls to him and beats the outside edge of the bat, to which Adam Parore (the New Zealand wicketkeeper) replied: “Bowled Shane!!”. Apparently Cullinan’s face turned all colours of the rainbow!!
Andre Nel was aiming to clean up the Indian tale enders when Sreesanth came into bat. firsts ball Nel welcomes him with a bouncer. All fired up, Nel runs down the wicket and says “Mate u gotta have heart to play that or you’re not gonna be standing at this crease for long.” Next ball Ssreesanth steps down the wicket and slams Nel over his head for a huge six!!!! The best part was the dance after!!!! One very happy, excited Indian!
Once, when the ball knocked off a bail, W.G.Grace replaced it and told the umpire: “Twas the wind which took thy bail orf, good sir.” The umpire replied: “Indeed, doctor, and let us hope thy wind helps the good doctor on thy journey back to the pavilion.”
Charles Kortright had dismissed him four or five times in a county game - only for the umpires to keep turning down his appeals. Finally, he uprooted two of Grace’s three stumps. Grace stalled, as though waiting for a no-ball call or something, before reluctantly walking off with Kortright’s words in his ears: “Surely you’re not going, doctor? There’s still one stump standing.”

And can you sledge your own mates under tough sledge rules?

Frank Tyson or Fred Truman (reports vary, but it sounds like Fred). The batsman edges and the ball goes to first slip,and right between Raman Subba Row’s legs. Fred doesn’t say a word. At the end of the over, Row ambles past and apologises sheepishly. “I should’ve kept my legs together.” and the bowler, still upset, replied “So should have your mother!”
“If it had been a cheese roll it would never have got past him.” Graham Gooch sledges one of his own, Mike Gatting, after Shane Warne’s first Ashes delivery bowled Gatting.
And it was Doug Walters to his team-mate Ashley Mallett, after Mallet had again been hit for another six, who quipped “Well, that gets rid of the reds, so I quess we’re on to the colours………..”

And what about the crowd. Should they be evicted for shouting out a sledge such as these?

At the SCG Len Pascoe had bowled loosely including several wides, and been smashed around the ground by the West Indies. After another fielding lapse when he let a ball through to the boundary, a voice yelled ” Geez, can’t bowl, can’t field. I bloody well hope you can bat, Pascoe!”.
“Tufnell! Can I borrow your brain? I’m building an idiot” An Aussie heckler for spinner Phil Tufnell during the 1994-95 tour.

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